KMLautanen - short lesson

Hello, this is the cannibal hotline. We will serve you as soon as possible.

My diary (In both English and Finnish, randomly. Also, a ton of homophones and other mistakes with commentary)


Full name: Katja Marika Lautanen-Lahti / Katja M. Lautanen-Lahti

Nicknames: KMLautanen, Katte, Kat

Born: March 9th, 1980

Interests: Everything. Absolutely everything! I'm a curious person.

Hair: dark brown, long (in 2020: 109 cm = approx. 43 inches from root to tip)

Height: about 160 cm / about 5ft 2 inches

Eyes: Grey

Allergies: Stupidity, feather dust (mild), penicillin.

Religion: The Holy Church of Shut-the-fuck-up, a religion also known as "Shutthefuckupism". No, really, I'm a sceptical atheist, and I dislike people trying to promote their religions. I won't try to covert you as long as you do the same for me. Deal?

Studies: Master's degree, University of Tampere (History major, minor in English philology and a number of other subjects and random courses. Everything is interesting!)

Home: Fågeltorp ('bird cottage'), a 100+-year old house (with a newer wing) in Finland: between 450-500m2 of space in the main building, a smaller separate sauna-building, and a decent-sized garden.

Keywords: Books, literary analysis, long conversations, emails, an old-fashioned hand-written diary, diamond doves, tea, chocolate, cakes, unusual interior design & work ( I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X.)], other design ( I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII IX X), classical music, opera, classic ballet, old art, soundtracks, theatre, aesthetics, social phobia, rhododendron varieties, orchids, gardening, collecting, sex, pleasures of mind and body, antiques, home, teetotaller, non-smoking, shoes, bi, older husband, age gap relationship, voracious reader, introvert, atheism, history, scifi, fantasy, horror, geek stuff, pessimism, sarcasm, cynicism, humor, sauna, spices, silence, shy.

Collections: Books (3000+), antiques, old decorative bird cages, Swarovski crystal figurines, Lewis Galoob's Cutie Club, mechanical automaton birds and some other toys)

Current relationship: Married, no children.


Some short thoughts:

This is the cannibal hotline. We will serve you as soon as possible.

The glass can be either half empty, half full or smashed against someone else's skull.

They say that universe has no boundaries, but the stupidity of a single human being could teach the universe a thing or two about lack of them.

Democracy is like a marathon for people with no sense of direction.

An aggressive optimist will make you laugh- even if it kills you. That's why aggressive pessimists are better: they'll kill you but they don't expect you to be happy about it.